Wednesday, March 16, 2011

The first two episodes of The Real World 25

You may notice I've ceased recapping Jersey Shore and Survivor, because nothing has been happening in Jersey Shore and I don't think anyone cares about Survivor who reads this blog. I'm totally willing to bring it back. Write all over my facebook wall so I look popular.


The Real World is now two episodes in. I decided not to immediately recap the first episode, because it's always pretty uninteresting. I'll just recap both episodes in one run-on sentence like they're the same episode. The roommates are as follows, Mike, who is very devout. He just lost his virginity about a month before coming to the show. Nany, which is pronounced like the bread, not the occupation. She's a very pretty girl, as it is a requirement to get on the show. Adam recently graduated from college. He and Nany hit it off immediately. You should know though, Nany has a boyfriend. The two of them have been dating for six years. Nany is 21. Leroy is the chill black guy on the show. Dustin is charming and southern. Heather is charming and southern (maybe), and a cute tiny girl. And finally we come to Naomi, who is just kind of there. Nany makes a point that she and her boyfriend are very serious, even though everyone else in the house is single. She tells Naomi that she and her boyfriend are at the point in their relationship where if they take a break, they're going to break up. Whatever that means. She says that because she's attracted to Adam. Adam is also attracted to Nany. Both of them are the worst. They are tied for the worst. When Nany calls her boyfriend she says "So, this guy here is attracted to me." And her boyfriend, very logically, says "Well, yeah. I'm not surprised. You're a good-looking girl." Then she gets really offended that he's not really offended. Then they shout at each other and she hangs up the phone. Elsewhere, Dustin and Mike are talking about who the hottest roommate is. They both say Heather, fair choice. But they've forgotten that Naomi wears half shirts! half shirts! Really, none of them are breathtakingly gorgeous, they're all just slightly more attractive than average. Dustin says that he falls in love easily. He doesn't say that he used to be a porn star, but he was, according to the wikipedia page for this season. He and Mike decide that "you don't shit where you eat." They're bros. But, Dustin eventually gives into temptation, as does Heather, who had the same philosophy, and the two hook up. Adam continues to hit on Nany and is really annoying about it. He says that he wants to marry her. When they go to the club that night, Adam brings home some girls. Adam thinks Nany is jealous, but Nany seems more confused because Adam said he wouldn't bring home any girls and would only concentrate on her. They go to lunch the next day and Adam tells her that last night was first time he ever brought a girl home like that. He also tells her that he is really shy around girls, which Nany believes is bullshit, and probably is. Adam goes on a date with the girl he brought home and proceeds to tell her that he's really shy around girls, and has no game at all. The roommates go the club again. Once there, Adam starts drinking. Nany is upset because she can't flirt with all za boys. Leroy comes over and says "You're in Vegas, you should have fun." And she dances the night away. Adam continues drinking. He tells Nany that he's drunk after one shot. Maybe he shouldn't drink an entire bottle of Grey Goose, but he does. He gets drunk and belligerent. A bouncer comes up to him and grabs his arms. His solution is to start kicking. Another bouncer comes up to him grabs his legs. But he had a fool proof plan! The bouncers bring him back up to the penthouse. Mike and Dustin see him and are like "What's going on?" Adam kicks the door shut and runs around. He grabs a glass vase and throws it to the ground. He looks at Mike and Dustin and asks "Where's Leroy? Is he getting it in?!" He is! Nany and the girls come back and Nany puts Adam to bed as he murmurs "Why does Nany have a boyfriend?" over and over. When Adam wakes up the next morning, everyone tells him he needs to apologize to the hotel, but Adam won't have any of it. Everyone but Dustin goes to Subway. After Subway, they play Truth -or- Dare. Leroy dares Heather to make out with Mike. But, Mike feels really bad about it. He doesn't want to upset Dustin. They make out anyway and Mike tells Leroy that Dustin will be pissed. When they get back, Leroy tells Dustin right away. Dustin seems fine with it, but after he sits with it for a while, he gets pissed. He tells Mike that if it had been reversed, Dustin wouldn't even think of doing that. Mike points out that 1. It was a game and 2. Dustin does not own Heather. Mike and Dustin were the two closest bros in the house, but not anymore it would seem. Heather is simply sitting in the girls' room with Nany and Naomi and says "It was just a kiss. Can't everyone just get over it?" So far, this season is great. Next week Adam is going to get super drunk again and cause a scene, even though he promised the hotel manager he wouldn't.

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