Friday, July 23, 2010

Two episodes of The Real World in one blog post!

Jake! What happened on the last two episodes of The Real World?!

Well, loyal reader, I will tell you.

As you know, Knight is trying his hardest to be the first white guy to sleep with Jemmye "stupid name" Carroll. (This nation is past race. We elected a black president.) So, that's still going on. This should be an amusing story arc that lasts for a majority of the season, right? Knight and Ashlee decide to make a countdown to when Knight will finally seduce her. The rest of the roommates take their guesses. Knight thinks it will take only three days. While all that is going on (If you know what I mean. I don't know what I mean.) Ryan, aka the third member of 3OH!3, is flirting a lot with Mckenzie! Oh man! Love is in the air (or something). So Ryan and Mckenzie get along really well, despite Ryan being the biggest douchebag and Mckenzie being a really sweet girl. One night, Ryan thinks he has a shot at sleeping with her, so he crawls into her bed, after she's already closed her eyes to fall asleep. This is a fool-proof plan. It's DEFINITELY going to work. There's NO. WAY. she'll kick him out. Then she kicks him out. The next day Mckenzie's friend, Suze, comes to visit. Ryan thinks Suze is a good lookin' lady. So they hook up while she's visiting. Mckenzie sad. While coming back from a night of partying Ryan calls Preston a fag. Preston and Ryan hate each even more now! Who thought it would be possible?! Preston pees on Ryan's toothbrush, you know, like mature adults. And Ryan sticks Preston's cigarettes up his butt, you know, like mature adults. Everybody thinks peeing on a toothbrush is so hilarious, because who doesn't love toilet humor/things Bear Grylls would do.

But Jake! What about Knight and that annoying Southern girl?! You've barely even mentioned them!

Well, after a night of very heavy drinking on Jemmeye's part they did not sleep together. Yeah! The amusing/disgusting sexual tension continues! The next night they didn't drink nearly as much and did sleep together. Gemey said she "thought it felt right." but then said that it's just sex with no feelings involved. So, that's over. Way to go Jimmy, you're a regular Hitchcock (that joke has two meanings.) This week's episode also featured the super bowl. SUPER BOWL! Sahar (the girl from Michigan!) said that she would publicly make out with Eric if the saints won. Preston was already publicly making out with someone though. His name was Maxwell. Here's what happened. Maxwell met up with Preston and the two start drinking and making out. Maxwell tells Preston he's only 20 and got in through a backdoor. Then Preston got kicked out because they thought he was providing for a minor. The security didn't tell him that though, so Preston thought it was because he was gay. Then he walks down the street, crying and it's pretty upsetting. Thankfully, that wasn't the reason. So he's let back into the bar after Ashlee vouches for him. Back in the bar Mckenzie has already had way too much to drink and meets some guy. Then they have more to drink together. They decide to leave. Preston and Ashlee go running after them and tell her that she's making a mistake. Preston tells her she needs to come back and the guy she was with holds his hands up like he's been confronted, but he wasn't at all. They barely even acknowledge him. He keeps his hands up THE ENTIRE TIME THEY'RE THERE! Mckenzie is defiant and goes with the creepy guy any way. That creepy guy wants to sex with Mckenzie, becuase there's nothing hotter than a girl who's one step away from being comatose. They go to this other bar that has, probably, 10-15 people in it. Mckenzie gets bored and says "I'm gonna taxi-cab." She gets back to the house and talks to Jymmie, but more just drunkenly mumbles. Drunk people are so funny/sad. Also, Knight and Jiemee are having sex everywhere and it's gross.

Next week, MTV would leave you to believe Mckenzie's going to get raped. yeah, reality television.

No comments: