Friday, September 24, 2010

THE EVENT is not the new lost. Stop saying that.

I was afraid to watch THE EVENT because I thought it would be really bad, but also grab my attention. Luckily, that didn't happen. Instead, it was just really bad. We begin with a bunch of people freaking out and a shaky camera. It sounds like a plane is about to crash. Then, 23 MINUTES EARLIER, we know it's exactly 23 minutes earlier because the title card tells us and there would have been no other way of explaining that the scene of people boarding, and on, an airplane was probably very recent. So, Jason Ritter is being all sketchy on this airplane. The airplane lifts off and soon after (I don't know exactly how long because it wasn't written on the screen) Jason Ritter gets up and holds one of the flight attendants at gun point. He demands that someone open the cockpit door. FLASHBACK EVEN MORE! 11 DAYS EARLIER. All this time jumping sure is confusing. I'm glad that they tell us whenever we're in a different time period. I hate having to figure out time lines on my own. LOST was really confusing because of that. I have the same problem with Quentin Tarintino movies. Jason Ritter and his girlfriend are getting ready for a cruise and Jason Ritter asks his girlfriend's dad for his blessing. He's like "yeah, okay." Also, Jason Ritter's girlfriend has a little sister, who is seven. She's kind of important, I guess. BUT NOW WE'RE BACK IN THE AIRPORT! Keepin' up!? This guy calls the control tower and is like "There's a terrorist on the plane" And the guy in charge of the control tower's like "I don't believe you!" And the guy's like "fine! There's a BOMB on the plane!" and the control tower guy goes "OH NO!" and tries to contact the plane, but the pilot's cut off all contact. OH NO! NOW WHAT! I'll tell you this guy's master plan. Since he can't stop the plane rationally, which is saying that there's a bomb on the plane, he'll stop it himself! How? He doesn't have that authority! That's right, but he does have his car. He decides the only solution is to drive at the plane. So, that's what he does. He drives his car at the plane. He finally gets his car up to speed with the plane (by the way, THIS IS A PLANE!) and does nothing. There's nothing he can do because he's trying to derail A PLANE with his Jeep. good plan, guy, good plan. The plane takes off and, like, terrorist stuff. Jason Ritter promises he's a good guy though. There are also flashbacks of the cruise where Jason Ritter and his girlfriend meet these two people, who don't seem like the best people and probably know about THE EVENT. The episode ends with the plane barreling toward the building on Florida coast where the president is about to give a press conference about some detainees (who won't tell the truth!) in Alaska. Suddenly, the plane disappears! What happened to the plane?! Who cares?

Here's my theory. The Event is not a specific time when something is going to happen. It's actually this secret organization and event is an acronym for something. Maybe I'm wrong Maybe I don't care about this show. I lied, I definitely don't care about this show.

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