Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Persons Unknown, ya know?

So, get this, Persons Unknown switched nights. It is now on Sunday nights, which threw me off completely because I don't understand how weeks work.

The first missed episode begins with Joe jogging around the gazebo in the morning. First things first, Why jog around only the gazebo? I know the town you're stuck in isn't very big, but at least it's bigger than the circumference of a gazebo. Moira and Graham are watching him. Graham says "Everything he does is routine. Almost too routine." No one seemed too suspicious of Joe before this episode, now suddenly everyone is. Whatever. plot advancement's important. Back outside the town Mark, the journalist/Janet's ex-husband, gets word of his "boss/lover" (That's how wikipedia describes character) being kidnapped. He rushes over to save her, but they're ambushed by men in blue jumpsuits. BLUE JUMPSUITS ARE IMPORTANT! They have guns pointed at Mark and his boss/lover. Then she knocks out one of the guys and the other guy turns around to see what happened and Mark knocks him over the head with a chair and they run away. As they're running out of the apartment building Mark's rival/cohort saves them from the bad guys. BAD GUYS! They get in his car and he speaks with a very low, comforting, but menacing voice. His lines sound like something out of an old film noir. He says things like "If you want my help you're going to have to stop asking so many questions. Kat, Mark's boss, starts screaming, so the driver hits her in her head with his gun and she passes out. Back in town, the abductees are eating at the chinese restaurant and Erika walks out with some breakfast food. Bill goes crazy for bacon, but gets stabbed in the hand with a fork when he tries to steal some from Erika. Erika then sits and eats with Janet. Tom, who is the one monitoring them (but who's monitoring HIM!?) and is the "head chef" at the restaurant. He watches as Janet and Erika eat bacon and says, "I've seen enough women's prison movies to know what that look means." He laughs to himself and says, "Just what I need, a love triangle." and turns to look at Joe, who smirks at him. After breakfast Janet decides to go shopping, or something. She asks if Erika wants to join, but Erika can't. She tells Janet, "I'm gonna take a bath." Back at the gazebo Charlie is talking to Bill. Bill tells him that he's tired of waiting around and wants to take action. He also says, "I'm tired of being everybody's monkey boy!" Whatever that means. Hey. Remember Tori? Well, her funeral was in the last episode. While her dad is talking this guy jumps out of his seat and starts yelling and points a gun at Tori's dad. Then a bunch of other people point guns at him. It was REEEAAAL Quentin Tarintino. Mark and Kat try to ask him some questions.

Alright, I got bored of summarizing this. Here's the rest of what happens this episode.

Bill decides smashing everything he can is going to help. Also, Bill is crazy.
Erika's got the hots for Janet, but so does John, so love triangle?
Tom calls this a "program."
Joe gets poisoned.
Mark and Kat dress up as a priest and a nun, for spy stuff, like spies do.
Moira makes two antidotes for Joe, but they are both risky, but may also be very beneficial. So Janet says, "So they could both kill him or both save him."
Erika thinks he may have been poisoned with Antifreeze, so offers him vodka to neutralize it. But first he has to admit that he's "one of them."
Mark and Kat get inside their car somehow. When they got out a car almost ran them over. Then the car they were in exploded.
Erika is the one who poisoned Joe. She looks into the camera and says "This is for you Bright Eyes." Then Conor Oberst shows up.

This episode was one of the worst ones yet.

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