Saturday, November 8, 2008

10 Most Overrated Bands of All Time

10. Nirvana:

A band that made one great album. People talk about what could have been, but honestly, after a debut like Nevermind, what did they have left to do? In Utero was okay, but it loomed under an unreachable shadow. Plus, Mudhoney was playing grunge before Nirvana. Finally, what band of any significance has modeled themselves after Nirvana (after the initial grunge scene)? They're indirectly responsible for Creed and Nickelback.

9. Grateful Dead

I honestly can't find anything redeeming about this band, except maybe for the fact that Jerry Garcia seemed like a pretty cool guy. Maybe it's because I don't smoke pot or drop acid, but what on earth would make someone throw away their life just to follow an average band around? Plus, they recorded just about everything they'd ever played, so they have more shitty tracks than pretty much any other band (even Nickelback, and their entire discography is shit!).

8. Metallica

They're huge musical success came with one of the biggest sell-out albums EVER. Honestly, why is there any fuss over the Black Album? It followed a highly ambitious and technical album (...And Justice For All), that really seemed to channel Metallica's creative energies. The afformentioned album gave Metallica its first top 10 album and legitimate hit (the fantastic "One," which hasn't even been ruined by the fact that it was on Guitar Hero 3). They get a whiff of success and what do they do? Hire the guy that produced Def Leppard (Bob Rock) to do their next album and completely take any edge out of their music. They then followed that up with over a decade of unbelievably shitty music (Load, Reload, St. Anger). Death Magnetic was a decent step forward, but it's tough to get past the fact that they over corrected James Hetfield's voice to the point that he sounds strikingly similar to Weird Al Yankovic.

7. Oasis

What on earth is their appeal? All they were was a front for the Gallaghers' egos. They try to rehash Beatles' songs, play the exact same chords and play songs that in the long run have no influence and are utterly meaningless. All this while overshadowing a band that actually wrote about real problems and did decent sonic experimentation (Blur). Utter drivel.

6. U2

The most self-absorbed band ever, even more so than Oasis. They have their own freaking iPod! The War to Achtung Baby era U2 was creative, while staying reasonably politically active. So after AB rekindles their career, what do they do? They become smug caricatures of themselves and make crappy albums for nearly two decades.

5. Pink Floyd

They have two great albums (Animals and The Wall). They have the best album cover ever (Wish You Were Here). But in the end, all they end up as is a band that is respected by most, but absolutely worshiped by various stoners for absolutely retarded reasons. Laser light shows? Dark Side of the Moon-Wizard of Oz mash-ups? Come on. In the end all they were doing was making above-average prog rock. Also, has anyone else noticed that their songs all sound strikingly similar to each other?

4. Led Zeppelin:

Sure, they were a pioneering hard rock band. Sure, they were good instrumentally. Sure, they made a few great albums. But this is why I think Led Zeppelin is overrated: their fans will aggressively hail them as being the best at everything. Best songwriters? NO. Ray Davies from the Kinks, David Bowie, Bob Dylan, John Lennon, Elvis Costello and Radiohead (various others, really, but I won't take the time to list them) destroy Zep. Best instrumentally? NO! Jimmy Page was a decent hard rock guitarist. Cool riffs, but nothing highly technical. Robert Plant sounded like the death rattle of a cat being disemboweled. John Paul Jones was a rhythmic bassist, but he wasn't even the best in his genre when he was playing (John Entwistle of The Who was). And don't even get me started about Bonzo. Yes, he was loud. Yes, he was a good drummer. But don't you dare cite Moby Dick to prove that he's the "best" drummer. It's an average drum solo. It's nothing compared to anything Neil Peart has even thought about doing. Keith Moon was better, so get over it Led-Heads. And, finally, there's Stairway to Heaven, one of the most boring songs ever made. Look, the solo is great. I won't dispute that, but it lacks anything else to keep the listener interested. The Who were the best hard rock band of the 60's and 70's. They were more ambitious and just as influential, so let's just settle that now.

3. The Sex Pistols

Punk pioneers, my ass. These guys were a glorified boy band, put together by a record company to capitalize on the rising wave of Punk Rock. For Christ's sake, Sid Vicious couldn't even play bass when they recruited him. How on earth does he deserve reverence? They went on to record 3 great songs (Anarchy in the U.K., God Save the Queen, Holiday in the Sun) along with a heap of sub-par ones all while maintaining a smug air of self importance. Johnny Rotten: Hot Topic legend.

2. The Doors

Good lord, why are people obsessed with this band? They made decent music, but just because Jim Morrison drank himself to death, they become untouchable martyrs? They were a pop band. Their songs never analyzed the problems of society and the lyrics were never exceptional. Their instrumentals were average, except maybe for their keyboards. So why on earth are they put in the top tier of the pantheon of rock bands?

1. The Beatles

If you know me, then you knew this was coming. I need to preface this by saying that I think the Beatles were an excellent band. Great songwriting, excellent sonic experiments and solid (though not great) instrumentals. Now we get to the meat. Why are the Beatles overrated? The fact that they have been rendered utterly beyond criticism or reasonable debate. They were the most successful band of all time and one of the most influential. They certainly deserve to be revered, but when people blindly accept the statement: " The Beatles are the best band ever," without questioning it at all and attacking anyone who says otherwise, it's a tad bit ignorant. In summation: Beatles = great band. Best? Perhaps. Up for debate, absolutely. Unquestionably, dogmatically the best ever? Unfair. So: Beatles = Overrated.

Hon. Mention:


My personal favorite band, which is why they're honorable mention. They've fallen victim to the classic trait of being overrated: swaths of pretentious fans that canonize them and attack anyone that suggests they are in any way flawed.

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